I read this book recently and was blown away by how succinct yet spot-on and helpful it was, for those of us grappling with how to respond in love as Bible-believing Christians to very real and increasingly difficult questions on what some call ‘sexual inclusion’.
This book, published in 2014, is one of the most current and relevant ones I’ve ever read. The blurb rightly states:
In the next year at least one of these things will happen in your life:
– A family member will come out of the closet and expect you to be okay with it.
– Your elementary-age child’s curriculum will discuss LGBT families.
– Your company will talk about building a tolerant workplace for LGBT co-workers.
– Your college-age child will tell you your view on homosexuality is bigoted.
Are you ready?
To be honest, I would say that many of us, if not most of us in the church today (especially in Singapore), are not ready.
Not ready or sufficiently equipped to speak the truth in love.
The authors make this important point:
Truth does not preclude kindness – and a good dose of humility is necessary to love our neighbours.
We are all in need of the healing that can only come from the truth of the gospel.
Barr and Citlau are the best people to write this book. Both in their 30s-40s, they are young enough to have grown up in this new normal, and mature enough to have walked with many in their flock through this difficult issue.
Both are also senior pastors from Reformed churches in the US, and their doctrine is thus accordingly sound. Incidentally, both have 4 sons each too, and are committed to ensuring that their children have good teaching and guidance on this topic.
Citlau’s relating of his own personal journey from being a drug-taking, practicing homosexual to a man who is leading a totally renewed life today, is especially powerful.
I really appreciated how intensely practical this book is, without being trite or overly prescriptive. And how they remind us, time and again, to cloak all that we say and do, in true graciousness. Our speech must always be seasoned with salt.
At the same time, we must hold our ground. It is hypocritical of others to say that ‘sexual inclusion’ is tolerance, whilst being totally intolerant of views to the contrary. We must respectfully beg to differ, and be allowed to maintain biblically faithful views (in a spirit and posture of love) in the public sphere. This is not hate speech. It is freedom of speech for me, as well as you. No one is preaching hate, but just asking for space to be able to hold biblical beliefs.
Tough questions today
Whilst the rest of the book provided good grounding as one grapples with this issue, chapter 9 (“When Push Comes to Shove – How can we navigate the soon-to-be everyday issues of living in a gay world?”) was the most helpful chapter to me. The page below is how the chapter opens.
Some of these questions have come to the fore for me, as I have since learnt that two acquaintances are now living in same-sex ‘marriages’ (albeit abroad) and have each adopted a child.
Although I have yet to be invited to a same-sex ‘wedding’, I think it is likely a matter of time that such celebrations become commonplace. So I appreciated the advice, which comes from prayerful consideration that bears no malice.
Some more pages of the kind of helpful advice that we can think through and apply.
All in all, I’d say that this book is totally worth buying, so that we think through these issues, figure out how to show love to our friends who may disagree with us, and frame our thoughts and responses, so that we are ready with a gracious and biblical answer, whenever the opportunity may arise.
This book is available from Shalom Christian Media at $15.40.
Other blog posts that you might like to read if you’re pondering this issue:
- https://www.lilbluebottle.com/the-lgbt-movement-considering-the-topic-as-biblically-faithful-christians/
- https://www.lilbluebottle.com/thoughts-on-books-about-christians-with-same-sex-attraction/
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